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Didi’s Manners & Etiquette: Last Minute Gifts & More

Thursday, December 18, 2014


Are you still looking for that perfect gift? You're not the only one and we've got fun ideas. How to introduce yourselves as a same-sex couple? The holidays are filled with questions to Didi Lorillard.

Introducing Yourselves as Two Married Men

We're a same-sex married couple who have recently moved into our second home in a very old-fashioned and yet somewhat sophisticated seaside town, and we're here for the holidays. We've been fortunate to have been invited to several Christmas parties where, obviously, we know very few of the other guests. Everyone is quite jovial and friendly, but we're wondering what is the proper etiquette for introducing two married men?  

~ Two Proper Bostonians, MA

Introduce yourself and let the new acquaintance introduce himself back to you. At that point, if your husband is standing by, he would pipe up and introduce himself. However, you or he may or may not mention that you are each other's husband.

A hetrosexual couple, would add, in introducing their partner, "And this is my husband, Adam Smith" -- or "And this is my wife Amy Grant." New Englanders are not as upfront about coming out to strangers. Same-sex male partners, for instance, are more likely to make a reference to their husband in conversation hoping that the new acquaintance will say, "And where is your husband?"

Should that happen, you would signal for your husband to come to your side so that you can introduce him. If he's across the room, you would lead your new acquaintance to him to make the introduction. 


Gifts For My Brother's Family

As the lucky uncle of my New England brother's sons and daughters ages 4 months to five-years-old, I need ideas for Christmas gifts for them as well as for my brother and his wife. Researching is easy, I just don't have a clue as to want to look for. Do you have suggestions? 

~Uncle Amo, Los Angeles 

Here are a few of our favorite gifts, some of which may work well for your nieces, nephews, and their parents. 

For your nieces and nephews:

  • Anatomically correct doll: Madame Alexander Cuddle Babies Lil Peanut 19" Boy Doll
  • Munchkin Mozart Magic Cube Baby Musical Toy
  • Munchkin Nursery Projector & Sound System
  • Connecting Tetris light systems with 7 different shapers
  • Retro traditional kitchen
  • Workbench
  • Marble run for age 3+
  • Painter pens
  • Map placemats
  • Microscope
  • Bowling set
  • Height Chart
  • Book Club
  • Helmet
  • Steiff teddy bear
  • Jellycat books for babies, "Jungly Tails" and "If I Were A Fox"


For their mother or father:

  • Fairphone the truly smart smartphone with social values is made of conflict-free minerals, and factory workers are paid a fair wage.
  • Craft Beer Club membership
  • Super juicer
  • Set of cocktail glasses
  • Books: "In the Land of Punctuation," by Christian Morgenstern, "Cities of the World," by Stephan Fussel, "How to Cook Everything Fast," by Mark Bittman
  • At Nudo.com, Adopt an Olive Tree in Italy for them and they'll receive fresh olive oil, or Adopt a Tea Garden in India for fresh Darjeeling


For him:  Elbow patch shirt from J.Crew, snugly socks, wool slippers, badger bristle shaving brush and handmade shaving soap

For her:  Fur collared sweater, fountain pen, gift certificate

You should be able to find all of these gifts on the internet.  ~Didi

Do you have a dilemma about love, family and life in general for Didi? Go ahead and "Ask Didi."  If your Question is used, we can withhold your name and/or location. 


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