Scott Taylor: How to Discipline Your Kids in 2015
Thursday, January 01, 2015
Well, we made it through another year and now the fun begins all over again.
I was speaking recently with my buddies, who will remain nameless for their protection, about how broke they are and how their wives can’t help but find it completely necessary to fall victim to all the holiday marketing hoopla that makes it impossible for them not to spend every last dime they have. I know guys spend money on stupid stuff but I’m not talking about that now. EASY.
All in the name of being festive, happy and generous and because of Jesus, Chanukah Harry, Santa Claus--and let's not forget, it's all for THE KIDS!
When I say kids, I’m not only talking about the little precious ones who wait for the reindeer to land on the roof with Santa, I’m speaking of the ones who you just sent in the college tuition payment for and the not-too-long-ago-paid credit card bill from their summer vacay to Cabo. Really???
Listen, everybody wants to be nice to his or her children and give them cool stuff and make them happy. We all want our kids to have a good life. I mean that’s what it’s all about, RIGHT?
If that is really true, then why do so many parents spoil their kids and make it virtually impossible to instill a proper work ethic and the skills they will need to be happy and self-reliant problem solvers?
Life is hard enough as it is, so you need a fighting chance to know how to scrap when the shit hits the fan. Our job is to love, teach and train, encourage and support them, not shmooze and entertain them like we are trying to land the Google account.
I’ve raised four children who are now almost all out of high school. I remember when I was looked at like a Navy Seal instructor, trying to make our kids ring the bell during Hell Week on Coronado Island. And for WHAT?!!
Truth is, if your kids have had a bad attitude this past year and they acted unappreciatively of all you do, there is a good chance that you may have enabled it from the start. That’s not to say you’re a loser or a bad parent. That’s not for me to judge. I’m just putting something out there.
My kids still terrorize me today, but I bet a little less than they could.
Here were my rules for our kids and their friends in our home--real complicated scary stuff. By the way, my poor, single mom without a degree in child psychology taught me this. And yes, I’m still a little screwed up, but I could have been a lot more.
Make your bed before you go to school.
Pick up the plate when you are done eating and put it in the dishwasher (I didn’t have no stinking dishwasher as a kid).
Ask to be excused from the table when done.
Always look people in the eye when speaking with them.
Use "Please" and "Thank you" ALWAYS.
Do chores around the house every day.
NEVER talk back to your parents or disrespectfully to adults. EVER.
They all had to get a job if they wanted extra money.
Almost all of their elementary school friends never had chores. Many talked back to their parents regularly. Through their late teen years, very few held a part-time job at any time.
There is no perfect system, and we are all human, and our children react differently and blah blah blah… It’s not that complicated: Stop reading so many books about child psychology or watching Dr. Phil. They are trying to sell you stuff, too. Get it?!
I’m sure that between your kids and my kids there are going to be some wild cards. No matter how they were raised they are bound to go sideways. Oh well. It’s a numbers game. Do the best you can.
I’m gonna give you three things to start telling your children, if it's not already too late to fix them, that will be game changers.
You will observe immediate positive results after a brief display of Outraged Child Disorientation, the other OCD.
Consider this my New Year’s present.
1. Cuz I Said So.
2. Life Isn’t Fair.
3. I Will Give You Something to Cry About. (And do it sometimes.)
Happy New Year.
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